Discoveries chapter 23
May. 25th, 2004 10:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tgrayficFirst, thanks to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
spikes_heart for the read through. Then I need to tell you to read it again because I changed about 50% of it.
Then a major thank you tospanderluv for becoming my collaborator on this story. This was the hardest chapter I could possibly imagine ever having to write.
It's not pretty, folks! Serious warning for non-con and abuse on this one!
Discoveries
S/X AU human
NC-17
Previous chapters are here.
Ethan turned around and walked out of the room, expecting Spike to follow.
Spike leaned in, kissed Xander and then stood up. “Why don’t you go upstairs and wait for me.”
“Why can’t I just…”
“Please?” For a house as large and intimidating as this one, Spike knew the walls were as thin as paper. He really didn’t want to take the chance of Xander hearing anything Ethan had to say.
“Alright. I’ll be upstairs if that’s what you want.” He sighed as he stood up, pushing his hands into his pockets. “Is he pissed that I’m here? I didn’t mean to… ”
“He’s always fucking pissed at something. Don’t worry about it. I’ll come up when I’m done.”
Xander nodded and Spike watched him slowly climb the stairs and disappear down the hallway. Once he was sure Xander was out of sight, he shoved his hand inside his pocket and pulled out the vial of coke. Twisting the cap off, he brought it to his nose and snorted the remaining powder. He rolled his shoulders, gained what courage he could and headed into Ethan’s office.
The older man was sitting silently behind his desk, sipping brandy from a crystal glass. He kept a stern eye as he watched Spike walk in and motioned toward the small chair sitting on the other side.
“Didn’t expect company, William.”
“Didn’t think I had to ask permission,” he answered. “And it’s Spike.”
“Of course you didn’t. You knew I’d say no” He poured more into his glass and took a sip. “And I refuse to call you by that obnoxious name.”
Spike’s lips curled into a frown.
“Have you seen Buffy?”
Spike shook his head. “We just got here.”
“It should have been the first thing on your mind.”
The blond looked down, playing with the chipped nail polish he hadn’t bothered to take off. “Sorry. Not my first priority, mate.”
Ethan leaned back into the chair, placing his hands behind his head. “Yes. I saw where your priorities were.”
“Fuck you. You don’t know anything about me or my priorities.”
“If sucking that boy’s cock doesn’t benefit my company, then your priorities aren’t where they need to be. If that’s the case, we’re going to have a very big problem. I’ve worked too long and hard to let you fuck this up.”
“Well I guess we’ve got a problem then,” he answered cockily.
“No William, we don’t.” Ethan stood up to walk around the desk and stopped directly in front of Spike. “Because you’re going to do whatever needs to be done for the good of this company at all means necessary.”
Spike pushed his chair back and stood, staring Ethan down, his face reddening in anger. He turned his back to him and poured himself a drink. “I know exactly what’s best for this company.”
“Obviously you don’t or you wouldn’t have left.”
Spike’s eyes went dark as he turned back around. “Why the fuck would I have stayed?”
“Because you had an obligation to me.”
“Obligation? What bloody obligation?! I didn’t owe you a fucking thing!”
“Oh, you owed me plenty, boy. You think your lifestyle came for free?! You had your clothes, your cars, your drugs…anything you wanted. I only expected one thing from you and you even managed to fuck that up.”
Spike scoffed and answered sarcastically, “I don’t remember hearing any complaints. If there were, you’d be the one to blame considering you were the one who taught me.”
Ethan’s face immediately turned to stone.
“What’s wrong? Truth hurt?”
“What truth? That I took what I wanted and made you my whore? Is that the truth you’re talking about? Or is it the fact that you started to like it? A few blowjobs for all the shit you could snort? Doesn’t seem like such a bad trade.”
“Fuck you, Ethan.”
“So it’s Ethan now. Show some respect, boy. After all, I am still your father.”
“You were never my bloody father,” he corrected through gritted teeth.
Ethan ignored the comment and changed the subject. “There’s a matter we need to discuss.”
Spike finished his drink in a long, steady gulp. “And that would be…?”
“Your boyfriend.”
His attention turned back to Ethan. “What’s he have to do with this?”
“Exactly my point. The next time you show up on my doorstep, remember to leave your fucktoy at home. I don’t need everyone knowing my son is a faggot.”
“Now I’m a faggot?” he asked as he began to laugh. “Why’s it I’m a faggot when I’m sucking his cock, but you didn’t seem to mind when I was sucking yours? If that makes me a faggot, what’s that make you?”
“I wouldn’t laugh if I were you. Things haven’t changed as much as you seem to think they have.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’m not afraid of you anymore. There’s nothing you can do to me more than you already have.”
“Oh there’s so much more I can do, William. How’d you like to wake up tomorrow and find your future gone? All because you couldn’t follow my rules. I could sell everything, retire on an island somewhere sipping margaritas, and there’s not a fucking thing you could do to stop it.” Ethan’s smirk made Spike’s blood boil.
“It’s my mum’s company, you bloody wanker.”
“Was your mother’s company. She’s not exactly around to complain, now is she.”
He’d tried to fight it, tried to control his anger but Ethan had gone too far. He drew back his fist and landed a hard blow to the other man’s jaw.
After the initial shock of the punch, Ethan smiled. “At least I taught you not to hit like a fag.” He wiped his bleeding lip and then crossed his arms in front of him. “So here’s the thing, William…as long as he’s here, let’s talk about your little fucktoy. You think he’d be up for a go with a few of our more… respectable clients?”
Spike’s eyes slanted in disgust.
“Of course, I’d have to have the first go myself to see if he’s up to company standards. What do you think? Is he as good a fuck as you were?”
Spike clenched his fists, his entire body tensed in anger. “Fuck you, you mother fucker. You don’t ever fucking touch him. You hear me?!”
“Now now, William. Did I strike a nerve?”
Ethan grinned in amusement and then let his face turn cold. “Now here’s the way I see it. I still own you for another four years. You do what I say, when I say it. Right now, your job is to keep Buffy happy, play nice with the clients and keep your fucking faggot boyfriend Out. Of. My. Way.”
Spike grit his teeth and looked directly into the other man’s eyes, showing all the hate and anger he’d been holding for nine long years.
“By the way, I have a meeting planned and I expect you to be there. I think you’ll remember the client? Harry Langston?”
Spike felt the turning of his stomach, the memory rushing at him with the speed of a freight train. He glanced up and saw the sadistic smile on Ethan’s face.
“I’ll kill him if he comes near me.”
Ignoring him, Ethan grabbed his coat from a hook on the back of the door and faced Spike. “I’m going out. I’ve enjoyed our little chat. You should visit more often.” He turned and left without waiting for a reply.
Shouting at the top of his lungs, Spike screamed, “Fuck you!” to the empty hallway.
Grabbing the bottle of Jack Daniels from the corner bar, he emptied a quarter of its contents before leaving, heading upstairs and into his room. In a fit of rage, he started searching. Overturning drawers, smashing everything in his path, he tore through the room looking for the bag that held the one thing that would make him not care.
Xander was in the doorway as soon as he heard the commotion from the other room.
“Spike?!”
The brunet froze when he saw the condition Spike was in along with the state of the room. He watched as Spike finished the last of what was in the bottle and then threw it against the wall, just barely missing him in the process.
Finally finding the bag that he was looking for, Spike ripped it open, pulling out the Crystal Meth.
Xander eased into the room, carefully approaching the other man. “What the hell is wrong with you?! What the fuck are you doing?!”
Spike’s voice was cold and angry. “Forgetting.”
“Forgetting what?! What are you talking about?!”
“Piss off, Harris. This is none of your fucking business!”
“If it’s about you, then it is my business!”
“Which part of piss off do you not understand?!”
“The part where you’re acting like a maniac and throwing things at me, dammit! ,” The tone in Xander’s voice increased. “What the hell’s wrong with you?!”
Trying to twist the cap off, he gave Xander a sideways glance. “Are you still here?! I told you to get the fuck out!” His attention turned back to the more important task of trying to open the vial with unsteady hands.
Walking over to Spike, he grabbed the object away from him. “You think this is what you need?! Well I hate to tell you, it’s not!” He walked into the bathroom, leaving Spike standing where he was and quickly flushed the vial.
Spike was on him within seconds. He lunged, grabbing him by the arm, whipping his body around to face him. “You fucker! What the fuck did you do that for?!”
“I thought maybe it’d get your attention!” Xander stopped yelling and tried to calm himself. “So maybe you’d talk to me.”
“You don’t want to know!” he screamed, tightening his grip on Xander’s arms. “Do you really want to know how he couldn’t keep his hands to himself!! Or his dick?! Maybe you’d like to hear how it got ‘im off even more when I’d beg him to stop! Is that what you want me to tell you?! Huh?!
“Spike.” Xander narrowed his eyes, feeling the fear welling up. Now that Spike was talking, he suddenly didn’t want to hear it.
After seeing the look on Xander’s face, he tilted his head and asked, “What’s the matter, Harris? Don’t like what you’re hearing? Well, too fucking bad. This is what you asked for!” Spike’s hands were digging in, shaking the other man as he spoke.
Xander let out a pained gasp. “Stop it, Spike. You’re hurting me.”
Suddenly realizing what he was doing, Spike eased his grip and threw Xander against the wall, storming out of the bathroom. “You asked for it.”
Xander rubbed the sore spot on his arms, collected himself and followed.
“I didn’t ask for you to take it out on me!”
Spike’s anger grew as he became focused on the spot where his fist was steadily banging against the wall, his knuckles open and bloody. “Just leave me the fuck alone.”
Xander walked up behind him, grabbed the swinging arm and turning him around to face him. “No!”
The fist came out, swinging halfway at Xander before Spike caught himself and stopped.
“Fuck!” he screamed, pushing his back against the wall. He waited, expecting Xander to yell, hit him back… something. Instead, he was surprised when Xander turned and leaned against the wall beside him.
Things were quiet. Both men dealing with their own anger at what almost happened. Finally, his tone calmer, Spike began to talk.
“You ever been beaten, Harris? Whipped so hard until your back bled and it hurt to lay down for two days? I have. Didn’t happen more than once or twice because I learned real quick. Learned it didn’t pay to fight back. Was easier just to give in, to let him…” His head bowed, trying to hide the tears that were steadily falling. “God, I can’t... You shouldn’t have to hear this.”
Spike’s lip was quivering as he tried to keep control. He shook his head and Xander turned to watch the tears begin to trickle over the half-closed lids.
He reached out and raised Spike’s chin to make sure he saw his face. “You need to do this. Tell me.”
“How am I supposed to...”
“Just start. I don’t care how. Just talk to me.”
Spike pulled away and walked over to the bed. He sat down on the edge and gripped the blanket, twisting it between his fingers. He kept his eyes low, away from Xander’s sight.
“At first, it was just a bit of touching. I hated it, hated him. I tried to fight. That’s when I’d get the belt. Never as hard as the first couple of times, but enough to make me do what he wanted.”
He took a deep, shaky breath and exhaled. “I’d jerk him off ‘til he came and then he’d leave. Became routine. Knew to expect it. But then he got tired of that, so I got my first lesson in cock sucking.” Xander watched the expression on Spike’s face as he told the horror of the memory. Staring down, eyes blank and dark, filled with tears, he re-counted the details of the nightmare he’d refused to share earlier that morning.
“I was thirteen. He’d been coming to me for a few months already, but that night, he was different. Possessive. Making threats. Fucked my mouth until I thought I was gonna gag on it.”
“God, Spike.”
“It was the last time I ever let him see me cry. Wouldn’t give the bastard the satisfaction after that. It’s easy to pretend it’s not happening if you really try…”
“Why didn’t you tell someone?! Say something?!”
“Tell who? He threatened to send me away! Send me to some school across the ocean! I couldn’t leave my mum. I wasn’t gonna leave her alone with that son of a bitch.”
“Why didn’t you tell her? She could have stopped it!”
“She was sick. Cancer was eatin’ ‘er up on the inside. Didn’t know how long she was gonna… I wasn’t gonna make her unhappy.”
“Jesus.”
“I learned to deal with it. Didn’t get bad until…”
He climbed from the bed, wiping his face with his hands and began pacing from one end of the room to the other.
Finally he stopped and turned his back away, standing in front of the long dresser. The drawers were missing or half-opened from his earlier rant. He glanced into the mirror, saw Xander watching him and quickly diverted his eyes.
“Until he decided I was old enough and started…” He looked down and wrapped his arms around his shaking body.
Xander closed his eyes, gripping the bed’s comforter between his fingers. He’d known it was coming, but hearing it made it too real.
“He started fucking you.”
“Yes.”
****************************
“I need to see you in my office.” Ethan had peeked his head around the corner, interrupting William’s attention from the book he’d been reading. The only escape he was ever allowed. No visits to friend’s houses, no after school sports. No socializing with anyone his own age.
He swung his legs around, standing up from the couch and headed into the small spare room Ethan had made into an office. He walked through the door and found the older man sitting behind the desk.
“Close the door, William.”
His stomach dropped. He knew what was expected behind closed doors. He took a deep breath and turned around, closing and locking the door behind him. Without being told, he lifted his shirt over his head and discarded his jeans and boxers, standing naked for his father’s view. Ethan stood up and went to his son.
“Today’s the big day.”
The blue, lost eyes refused to look up. “Yes, sir.”
“Sixteen is a special age. Is there anything you want?” He walked around, letting his hand rub along the bare chest and down along the defined stomach muscles.
Go fuck yourself “No.”
Ethan pressed his body against William’s backside, reaching around to grip his cock.
“You’ve become a fine looking man. A little scrawnier than I’d prefer, but you have a lot of potential. I’m sure plenty of other people would agree.”
William closed his eyes, blocking out the feel of the hand pulling on his dick. At sixteen, it had begun to betray his brain, hardening at the touch of Ethan’s hand, just as he’d said it would years ago. Once he was fully erect, the hand disappeared and William heard the sound of Ethan’s belt being unbuckled.
“Turn around and look at me.”
He hesitated, panicked, and finally turned to find Ethan already undressed, standing with one hand massaging his cock, while the other gripped his balls underneath. It was wet, glistening with a slick substance.
“I’ve waited such a long time for this. Couldn’t wait anymore. Got myself ready and everything.”
William blinked and felt his entire world crumble when he realized what was happening. When he realized the only ounce of innocence he still had was about to be taken. He was positive Ethan saw the terror in his eyes because he received the smile. The smile that said nothing more than ‘I win’.
******************
Xander was about to move, wanting to be closer, but decided to give Spike his space while he continued to talk.
*******************
“Bend over the desk, boy.”
William raised his eyes and stared into the cold, empty ones he knew so well.
“Do I have to tell you twice?”
And then he felt like that twelve-year-old boy again. “No, sir.”
He swallowed the bit of pride he thought he still had and turned around, gripping the edge of the desk. Ethan’s hands pulled at his ass, pushing the cheeks apart.
“It’s gonna hurt some. But it’ll make you remember...”
He felt the blunt head against his hole.
“The first time…”
Pressing and tearing into him.
“you were fucked…”
Rough and hard. Too hard for anyone’s first time.
***************************
Spike found Xander’s eyes, wet with tears. He didn’t want to continue, but knew he couldn’t stop there. He could only hope that after everything was out in the open, Xander would still want him, so he continued.
****************************
“It’s time you start earning your keep around here.”
Two weeks after the first time and William had been buggered every day since. This time in his own room, pushed against the head rail like he’d been so many times before. Only this time, Ethan’s cock was buried inside him.
“You need to start helping the company. It’s only fair if you want to be part of it some day.”
Ethan came, spilling himself inside William’s ass and then casually pulled out. By the time William let go of the rail and slid down onto the bed, the older man was already dressed, zipping his fly.
“I have a client who will be here to meet you around 6:00 this evening. It’s fairly simple. Entertain him. I’ve set some rules into place and he knows what’s allowed and what’s not. Be nice. Courteous. Just do what he says.”
****************************
Spike, reliving the memory as he told it, felt the nausea churning. He ran for the bathroom and began to retch, choking as he coughed up the contents in his stomach. Xander was up off the bed and at Spike’s side right away, his arm gently rubbing his back.
“Please tell me he didn’t…”
Spike’s eyes and the sobbing that began answered Xander’s question. The blond sat back, leaning against the side of the wall.
“I didn’t care, Xander. By then, I just didn’t care. If I started to, Ethan would give me something to make it not matter. As long as he had their money, he’d give me anything I wanted.”
“Anything?”
He was still choking on his tears. “Anything. Coke, heroin… whatever. Didn’t matter as long as I didn’t feel anything. Easy to give a blow job, even easier to receive one if you’re too doped up to care.”
A thought popped into Xander’s head that made him cringe. The thought of Spike fucking him earlier that day, high on coke. Xander had known enough to realized it immediately. You fuck without feeling. A stranger wouldn’t.
“I was everyone’s whore, Xander. I was told where, when and who. Ethan arranged it, and I...” he stopped and sniffed, trying to hold it inside.
“Somewhere along the way, while it was happening, my mum finally gave up. I don’t think she ever knew. I’d have killed myself if I thought she did.”
Xander moved in, closing the distance between them and grabbed Spike. He wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight as he pulled him to his feet. Staring at Xander, in shock that he was still there, he tightened his arms around him and let his emotions go.
“Please, Xan. Please don’t hate me. Please…”
Xander pulled away.
“God, Spike! Don’t even say that! It’s not your fault! None of it!”
“I let him do it… I couldn’t fight…”
“It’s over now. You got away, right? He didn’t win.”
“He won, Xander. He definitely won.”
*********************************
They’d moved into the new house three weeks after his mum died. Business never faltered and William was spiraling, barely caring what day it was, much less giving a fuck about the special room set up just for entertaining. The rules were the same, which William had finally figured out on his own. What was allowed and what wasn’t. A client had never fucked him, so it was easy to guess that Ethan wouldn’t allow it.
“William, I’d like you to meet Harry Langston. He’s a special client so I expect you to give him whatever he wants.”
“Yes, sir.”
Ethan left William alone with the man in the tailored three-piece business suit.
“Mr. Langston?”
“Call me Harry.”
William nodded and offered his guest a drink. This part he’d begun to enjoy. Watching the men, trying to determine what they were into. What they would want. Slowly bringing out the hidden kinks, usually surprised by what each man wanted. He poured the liquor while Harry ventured around the room.
“Nice system.”
William glanced up at the entertainment system and grabbed the remote. He pushed play and watched as the sight and sound of men fucking appeared on the large, wide-screen television adorning the wall.
Harry smiled and downed his drink.
“Your father speaks highly of you.”
William frowned and went back for a refill after having finished his own. Harry’s attention was focused on the screen, so William took the advantage and inhaled a couple of lines from his stash on a table in the corner. Meant for the guest’s enjoyment, William always managed to hoard most of it for his own use.
“You want to come and watch with me?”
William nodded, joining the other man on the large, cushioned sofa.
“You’re young. Sixteen? Seventeen?”
“Almost eighteen. Two weeks.”
Harry nodded.
“You really are handsome. My guess is you’ve been told that before, though.”
You’ve become a fine looking man. William shrugged.
His eyes fell on Harry’s crotch and he noticed the prominent bulge pushing against the slacks. He reached across and began rubbing it with the palm of his hand. Better to get it over with.
“Mmm. That’s nice,” came the deep voice. “But it’d be nicer in your mouth.”
Like a robot, William pulled the cock free and took it into his mouth. Harry’s hands were in his hair, twisting and pulling and he realized this client enjoyed it rough. He complied and added a bit more force to the blowjob.
Harry’s breath hitched. “No, stop! I don’t want to come yet.”
William obeyed and let the cock go.
“Just let me catch my breath, okay?”
He sat back on the couch and waited for round two. A few minutes went by and William was getting antsy. Harry hadn’t moved, his eyes focused completely on the television.
“You like that?”
“What?” William asked, turning to the screen.
“Don’t tell me that doesn’t make you hard. All that fucking… all those men…”
He shrugged. “Guess I’ve gotten used to it. Same movie, different day.”
Harry laughed and his hand moved to rub against William’s jeans. “This would be better if you were naked.”
He nodded and did as he was told.
He stood in front of the other man’s dilated eyes and saw the look he’d become accustomed to. The look of hunger. Harry stood up, moving closer.
“You have a nice cock,” he whispered as he gave it a pull. “But you have an even nicer ass.” The man’s erection rubbed against William’s when their bodies met, large hands reaching around to grip his cheeks. “I’d like to have a go at that.”
William flinched and his body stiffened. Harry pulled him around in a quick movement, grinding his cock against the naked crack. “Bet you’re a real good fuck.”
He tried to pull away but the hands gripped him tighter. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“Stop, you bloody tosser. This isn’t funny.”
“Are you afraid?”
William pulled again. “Sod off.”
Harry laughed and pushed him hard against the wall.
“Go ahead and fight. Makes it better.”
William felt surrounded. The sounds of sex around him, the feel of the large body pushing against him and then finally the hands pulling, opening his ass for the large, dry cock to enter.
“No! Don’t!”
“That’s right, beg me to stop. Tell me you don’t want it.”
“Fuck you!”
Pushing and tearing against the walls of his rectum, he felt the burn as the man forced his way deeper inside William's body.
“God, that’s so fucking tight. Pretty boy like you... worth every fucking penny.”
He felt his ass give in, the blood becoming lubricant for the cock to glide on.
“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck…” Harry chanted, pushing in and out, in and out, panting and breathing, grunting against William’s neck.
William heard screaming. Tried to drown it out. Tried to stop it. It was the sound of his own voice but he couldn’t control it. He felt it when the man began to fill him, felt it when the object was pulled from his ass and felt it when he was let go and dropped roughly to the floor. Finally, the sounds in the room faded and everything went dark.
*******************************
Ethan wiped the come from his hands, put his cock back inside his pants and turned off the monitor to the guest room. He pushed a button to allow the CD Rom to slide open. He labeled the CD – William 5/21/2001. Placing it into a case, he pulled out the hidden drawer under his desk and placed the CD with the rest of his collection.
********************************
Xander led Spike back into the bedroom and eased him onto the bed, forcing him to lie down. “You’re okay. You’re safe,” he whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed beside him.
Spike looked up, his eyes distant, still wet with tears.
“It’ll never be okay.”
“Spike, listen to me. Let’s get out of here. There’s no reason for you to be here!”
“I can’t,” he said, his voice worn out and weak. “I have to stay.”
“Why would you put yourself through this? It’s not worth it!”
“It is to me. Xander, this is the only way I know to hurt him. Make him pay. I’m not gonna sit back and let him have my mum’s company! It might seem stupid to you, but it’s all I’ve got. I just have to stick it out a little bit longer.”
Xander nodded. “Then we’ll stick it out together.” He pulled the blanket up to cover Spike’s body and began to walk back to his own room.
“Xan?”
He stopped and turned back around.
“Please stay. I need you.”
Moving back to the bed, he climbed in under the blanket and pulled Spike against him, wrapping his arm tightly around his waist. When he felt Spike’s body relax against his, he finally let his own do the same.
Questions? Comments? (No threats of bodily harm, please! I'm just telling it!)
spikes_heart for the read through. Then I need to tell you to read it again because I changed about 50% of it.Then a major thank you to
spanderluv for becoming my collaborator on this story. This was the hardest chapter I could possibly imagine ever having to write.It's not pretty, folks! Serious warning for non-con and abuse on this one!
Discoveries
S/X AU human
NC-17
Previous chapters are here.
Ethan turned around and walked out of the room, expecting Spike to follow.
Spike leaned in, kissed Xander and then stood up. “Why don’t you go upstairs and wait for me.”
“Why can’t I just…”
“Please?” For a house as large and intimidating as this one, Spike knew the walls were as thin as paper. He really didn’t want to take the chance of Xander hearing anything Ethan had to say.
“Alright. I’ll be upstairs if that’s what you want.” He sighed as he stood up, pushing his hands into his pockets. “Is he pissed that I’m here? I didn’t mean to… ”
“He’s always fucking pissed at something. Don’t worry about it. I’ll come up when I’m done.”
Xander nodded and Spike watched him slowly climb the stairs and disappear down the hallway. Once he was sure Xander was out of sight, he shoved his hand inside his pocket and pulled out the vial of coke. Twisting the cap off, he brought it to his nose and snorted the remaining powder. He rolled his shoulders, gained what courage he could and headed into Ethan’s office.
The older man was sitting silently behind his desk, sipping brandy from a crystal glass. He kept a stern eye as he watched Spike walk in and motioned toward the small chair sitting on the other side.
“Didn’t expect company, William.”
“Didn’t think I had to ask permission,” he answered. “And it’s Spike.”
“Of course you didn’t. You knew I’d say no” He poured more into his glass and took a sip. “And I refuse to call you by that obnoxious name.”
Spike’s lips curled into a frown.
“Have you seen Buffy?”
Spike shook his head. “We just got here.”
“It should have been the first thing on your mind.”
The blond looked down, playing with the chipped nail polish he hadn’t bothered to take off. “Sorry. Not my first priority, mate.”
Ethan leaned back into the chair, placing his hands behind his head. “Yes. I saw where your priorities were.”
“Fuck you. You don’t know anything about me or my priorities.”
“If sucking that boy’s cock doesn’t benefit my company, then your priorities aren’t where they need to be. If that’s the case, we’re going to have a very big problem. I’ve worked too long and hard to let you fuck this up.”
“Well I guess we’ve got a problem then,” he answered cockily.
“No William, we don’t.” Ethan stood up to walk around the desk and stopped directly in front of Spike. “Because you’re going to do whatever needs to be done for the good of this company at all means necessary.”
Spike pushed his chair back and stood, staring Ethan down, his face reddening in anger. He turned his back to him and poured himself a drink. “I know exactly what’s best for this company.”
“Obviously you don’t or you wouldn’t have left.”
Spike’s eyes went dark as he turned back around. “Why the fuck would I have stayed?”
“Because you had an obligation to me.”
“Obligation? What bloody obligation?! I didn’t owe you a fucking thing!”
“Oh, you owed me plenty, boy. You think your lifestyle came for free?! You had your clothes, your cars, your drugs…anything you wanted. I only expected one thing from you and you even managed to fuck that up.”
Spike scoffed and answered sarcastically, “I don’t remember hearing any complaints. If there were, you’d be the one to blame considering you were the one who taught me.”
Ethan’s face immediately turned to stone.
“What’s wrong? Truth hurt?”
“What truth? That I took what I wanted and made you my whore? Is that the truth you’re talking about? Or is it the fact that you started to like it? A few blowjobs for all the shit you could snort? Doesn’t seem like such a bad trade.”
“Fuck you, Ethan.”
“So it’s Ethan now. Show some respect, boy. After all, I am still your father.”
“You were never my bloody father,” he corrected through gritted teeth.
Ethan ignored the comment and changed the subject. “There’s a matter we need to discuss.”
Spike finished his drink in a long, steady gulp. “And that would be…?”
“Your boyfriend.”
His attention turned back to Ethan. “What’s he have to do with this?”
“Exactly my point. The next time you show up on my doorstep, remember to leave your fucktoy at home. I don’t need everyone knowing my son is a faggot.”
“Now I’m a faggot?” he asked as he began to laugh. “Why’s it I’m a faggot when I’m sucking his cock, but you didn’t seem to mind when I was sucking yours? If that makes me a faggot, what’s that make you?”
“I wouldn’t laugh if I were you. Things haven’t changed as much as you seem to think they have.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’m not afraid of you anymore. There’s nothing you can do to me more than you already have.”
“Oh there’s so much more I can do, William. How’d you like to wake up tomorrow and find your future gone? All because you couldn’t follow my rules. I could sell everything, retire on an island somewhere sipping margaritas, and there’s not a fucking thing you could do to stop it.” Ethan’s smirk made Spike’s blood boil.
“It’s my mum’s company, you bloody wanker.”
“Was your mother’s company. She’s not exactly around to complain, now is she.”
He’d tried to fight it, tried to control his anger but Ethan had gone too far. He drew back his fist and landed a hard blow to the other man’s jaw.
After the initial shock of the punch, Ethan smiled. “At least I taught you not to hit like a fag.” He wiped his bleeding lip and then crossed his arms in front of him. “So here’s the thing, William…as long as he’s here, let’s talk about your little fucktoy. You think he’d be up for a go with a few of our more… respectable clients?”
Spike’s eyes slanted in disgust.
“Of course, I’d have to have the first go myself to see if he’s up to company standards. What do you think? Is he as good a fuck as you were?”
Spike clenched his fists, his entire body tensed in anger. “Fuck you, you mother fucker. You don’t ever fucking touch him. You hear me?!”
“Now now, William. Did I strike a nerve?”
Ethan grinned in amusement and then let his face turn cold. “Now here’s the way I see it. I still own you for another four years. You do what I say, when I say it. Right now, your job is to keep Buffy happy, play nice with the clients and keep your fucking faggot boyfriend Out. Of. My. Way.”
Spike grit his teeth and looked directly into the other man’s eyes, showing all the hate and anger he’d been holding for nine long years.
“By the way, I have a meeting planned and I expect you to be there. I think you’ll remember the client? Harry Langston?”
Spike felt the turning of his stomach, the memory rushing at him with the speed of a freight train. He glanced up and saw the sadistic smile on Ethan’s face.
“I’ll kill him if he comes near me.”
Ignoring him, Ethan grabbed his coat from a hook on the back of the door and faced Spike. “I’m going out. I’ve enjoyed our little chat. You should visit more often.” He turned and left without waiting for a reply.
Shouting at the top of his lungs, Spike screamed, “Fuck you!” to the empty hallway.
Grabbing the bottle of Jack Daniels from the corner bar, he emptied a quarter of its contents before leaving, heading upstairs and into his room. In a fit of rage, he started searching. Overturning drawers, smashing everything in his path, he tore through the room looking for the bag that held the one thing that would make him not care.
Xander was in the doorway as soon as he heard the commotion from the other room.
“Spike?!”
The brunet froze when he saw the condition Spike was in along with the state of the room. He watched as Spike finished the last of what was in the bottle and then threw it against the wall, just barely missing him in the process.
Finally finding the bag that he was looking for, Spike ripped it open, pulling out the Crystal Meth.
Xander eased into the room, carefully approaching the other man. “What the hell is wrong with you?! What the fuck are you doing?!”
Spike’s voice was cold and angry. “Forgetting.”
“Forgetting what?! What are you talking about?!”
“Piss off, Harris. This is none of your fucking business!”
“If it’s about you, then it is my business!”
“Which part of piss off do you not understand?!”
“The part where you’re acting like a maniac and throwing things at me, dammit! ,” The tone in Xander’s voice increased. “What the hell’s wrong with you?!”
Trying to twist the cap off, he gave Xander a sideways glance. “Are you still here?! I told you to get the fuck out!” His attention turned back to the more important task of trying to open the vial with unsteady hands.
Walking over to Spike, he grabbed the object away from him. “You think this is what you need?! Well I hate to tell you, it’s not!” He walked into the bathroom, leaving Spike standing where he was and quickly flushed the vial.
Spike was on him within seconds. He lunged, grabbing him by the arm, whipping his body around to face him. “You fucker! What the fuck did you do that for?!”
“I thought maybe it’d get your attention!” Xander stopped yelling and tried to calm himself. “So maybe you’d talk to me.”
“You don’t want to know!” he screamed, tightening his grip on Xander’s arms. “Do you really want to know how he couldn’t keep his hands to himself!! Or his dick?! Maybe you’d like to hear how it got ‘im off even more when I’d beg him to stop! Is that what you want me to tell you?! Huh?!
“Spike.” Xander narrowed his eyes, feeling the fear welling up. Now that Spike was talking, he suddenly didn’t want to hear it.
After seeing the look on Xander’s face, he tilted his head and asked, “What’s the matter, Harris? Don’t like what you’re hearing? Well, too fucking bad. This is what you asked for!” Spike’s hands were digging in, shaking the other man as he spoke.
Xander let out a pained gasp. “Stop it, Spike. You’re hurting me.”
Suddenly realizing what he was doing, Spike eased his grip and threw Xander against the wall, storming out of the bathroom. “You asked for it.”
Xander rubbed the sore spot on his arms, collected himself and followed.
“I didn’t ask for you to take it out on me!”
Spike’s anger grew as he became focused on the spot where his fist was steadily banging against the wall, his knuckles open and bloody. “Just leave me the fuck alone.”
Xander walked up behind him, grabbed the swinging arm and turning him around to face him. “No!”
The fist came out, swinging halfway at Xander before Spike caught himself and stopped.
“Fuck!” he screamed, pushing his back against the wall. He waited, expecting Xander to yell, hit him back… something. Instead, he was surprised when Xander turned and leaned against the wall beside him.
Things were quiet. Both men dealing with their own anger at what almost happened. Finally, his tone calmer, Spike began to talk.
“You ever been beaten, Harris? Whipped so hard until your back bled and it hurt to lay down for two days? I have. Didn’t happen more than once or twice because I learned real quick. Learned it didn’t pay to fight back. Was easier just to give in, to let him…” His head bowed, trying to hide the tears that were steadily falling. “God, I can’t... You shouldn’t have to hear this.”
Spike’s lip was quivering as he tried to keep control. He shook his head and Xander turned to watch the tears begin to trickle over the half-closed lids.
He reached out and raised Spike’s chin to make sure he saw his face. “You need to do this. Tell me.”
“How am I supposed to...”
“Just start. I don’t care how. Just talk to me.”
Spike pulled away and walked over to the bed. He sat down on the edge and gripped the blanket, twisting it between his fingers. He kept his eyes low, away from Xander’s sight.
“At first, it was just a bit of touching. I hated it, hated him. I tried to fight. That’s when I’d get the belt. Never as hard as the first couple of times, but enough to make me do what he wanted.”
He took a deep, shaky breath and exhaled. “I’d jerk him off ‘til he came and then he’d leave. Became routine. Knew to expect it. But then he got tired of that, so I got my first lesson in cock sucking.” Xander watched the expression on Spike’s face as he told the horror of the memory. Staring down, eyes blank and dark, filled with tears, he re-counted the details of the nightmare he’d refused to share earlier that morning.
“I was thirteen. He’d been coming to me for a few months already, but that night, he was different. Possessive. Making threats. Fucked my mouth until I thought I was gonna gag on it.”
“God, Spike.”
“It was the last time I ever let him see me cry. Wouldn’t give the bastard the satisfaction after that. It’s easy to pretend it’s not happening if you really try…”
“Why didn’t you tell someone?! Say something?!”
“Tell who? He threatened to send me away! Send me to some school across the ocean! I couldn’t leave my mum. I wasn’t gonna leave her alone with that son of a bitch.”
“Why didn’t you tell her? She could have stopped it!”
“She was sick. Cancer was eatin’ ‘er up on the inside. Didn’t know how long she was gonna… I wasn’t gonna make her unhappy.”
“Jesus.”
“I learned to deal with it. Didn’t get bad until…”
He climbed from the bed, wiping his face with his hands and began pacing from one end of the room to the other.
Finally he stopped and turned his back away, standing in front of the long dresser. The drawers were missing or half-opened from his earlier rant. He glanced into the mirror, saw Xander watching him and quickly diverted his eyes.
“Until he decided I was old enough and started…” He looked down and wrapped his arms around his shaking body.
Xander closed his eyes, gripping the bed’s comforter between his fingers. He’d known it was coming, but hearing it made it too real.
“He started fucking you.”
“Yes.”
****************************
“I need to see you in my office.” Ethan had peeked his head around the corner, interrupting William’s attention from the book he’d been reading. The only escape he was ever allowed. No visits to friend’s houses, no after school sports. No socializing with anyone his own age.
He swung his legs around, standing up from the couch and headed into the small spare room Ethan had made into an office. He walked through the door and found the older man sitting behind the desk.
“Close the door, William.”
His stomach dropped. He knew what was expected behind closed doors. He took a deep breath and turned around, closing and locking the door behind him. Without being told, he lifted his shirt over his head and discarded his jeans and boxers, standing naked for his father’s view. Ethan stood up and went to his son.
“Today’s the big day.”
The blue, lost eyes refused to look up. “Yes, sir.”
“Sixteen is a special age. Is there anything you want?” He walked around, letting his hand rub along the bare chest and down along the defined stomach muscles.
Go fuck yourself “No.”
Ethan pressed his body against William’s backside, reaching around to grip his cock.
“You’ve become a fine looking man. A little scrawnier than I’d prefer, but you have a lot of potential. I’m sure plenty of other people would agree.”
William closed his eyes, blocking out the feel of the hand pulling on his dick. At sixteen, it had begun to betray his brain, hardening at the touch of Ethan’s hand, just as he’d said it would years ago. Once he was fully erect, the hand disappeared and William heard the sound of Ethan’s belt being unbuckled.
“Turn around and look at me.”
He hesitated, panicked, and finally turned to find Ethan already undressed, standing with one hand massaging his cock, while the other gripped his balls underneath. It was wet, glistening with a slick substance.
“I’ve waited such a long time for this. Couldn’t wait anymore. Got myself ready and everything.”
William blinked and felt his entire world crumble when he realized what was happening. When he realized the only ounce of innocence he still had was about to be taken. He was positive Ethan saw the terror in his eyes because he received the smile. The smile that said nothing more than ‘I win’.
******************
Xander was about to move, wanting to be closer, but decided to give Spike his space while he continued to talk.
*******************
“Bend over the desk, boy.”
William raised his eyes and stared into the cold, empty ones he knew so well.
“Do I have to tell you twice?”
And then he felt like that twelve-year-old boy again. “No, sir.”
He swallowed the bit of pride he thought he still had and turned around, gripping the edge of the desk. Ethan’s hands pulled at his ass, pushing the cheeks apart.
“It’s gonna hurt some. But it’ll make you remember...”
He felt the blunt head against his hole.
“The first time…”
Pressing and tearing into him.
“you were fucked…”
Rough and hard. Too hard for anyone’s first time.
***************************
Spike found Xander’s eyes, wet with tears. He didn’t want to continue, but knew he couldn’t stop there. He could only hope that after everything was out in the open, Xander would still want him, so he continued.
****************************
“It’s time you start earning your keep around here.”
Two weeks after the first time and William had been buggered every day since. This time in his own room, pushed against the head rail like he’d been so many times before. Only this time, Ethan’s cock was buried inside him.
“You need to start helping the company. It’s only fair if you want to be part of it some day.”
Ethan came, spilling himself inside William’s ass and then casually pulled out. By the time William let go of the rail and slid down onto the bed, the older man was already dressed, zipping his fly.
“I have a client who will be here to meet you around 6:00 this evening. It’s fairly simple. Entertain him. I’ve set some rules into place and he knows what’s allowed and what’s not. Be nice. Courteous. Just do what he says.”
****************************
Spike, reliving the memory as he told it, felt the nausea churning. He ran for the bathroom and began to retch, choking as he coughed up the contents in his stomach. Xander was up off the bed and at Spike’s side right away, his arm gently rubbing his back.
“Please tell me he didn’t…”
Spike’s eyes and the sobbing that began answered Xander’s question. The blond sat back, leaning against the side of the wall.
“I didn’t care, Xander. By then, I just didn’t care. If I started to, Ethan would give me something to make it not matter. As long as he had their money, he’d give me anything I wanted.”
“Anything?”
He was still choking on his tears. “Anything. Coke, heroin… whatever. Didn’t matter as long as I didn’t feel anything. Easy to give a blow job, even easier to receive one if you’re too doped up to care.”
A thought popped into Xander’s head that made him cringe. The thought of Spike fucking him earlier that day, high on coke. Xander had known enough to realized it immediately. You fuck without feeling. A stranger wouldn’t.
“I was everyone’s whore, Xander. I was told where, when and who. Ethan arranged it, and I...” he stopped and sniffed, trying to hold it inside.
“Somewhere along the way, while it was happening, my mum finally gave up. I don’t think she ever knew. I’d have killed myself if I thought she did.”
Xander moved in, closing the distance between them and grabbed Spike. He wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight as he pulled him to his feet. Staring at Xander, in shock that he was still there, he tightened his arms around him and let his emotions go.
“Please, Xan. Please don’t hate me. Please…”
Xander pulled away.
“God, Spike! Don’t even say that! It’s not your fault! None of it!”
“I let him do it… I couldn’t fight…”
“It’s over now. You got away, right? He didn’t win.”
“He won, Xander. He definitely won.”
*********************************
They’d moved into the new house three weeks after his mum died. Business never faltered and William was spiraling, barely caring what day it was, much less giving a fuck about the special room set up just for entertaining. The rules were the same, which William had finally figured out on his own. What was allowed and what wasn’t. A client had never fucked him, so it was easy to guess that Ethan wouldn’t allow it.
“William, I’d like you to meet Harry Langston. He’s a special client so I expect you to give him whatever he wants.”
“Yes, sir.”
Ethan left William alone with the man in the tailored three-piece business suit.
“Mr. Langston?”
“Call me Harry.”
William nodded and offered his guest a drink. This part he’d begun to enjoy. Watching the men, trying to determine what they were into. What they would want. Slowly bringing out the hidden kinks, usually surprised by what each man wanted. He poured the liquor while Harry ventured around the room.
“Nice system.”
William glanced up at the entertainment system and grabbed the remote. He pushed play and watched as the sight and sound of men fucking appeared on the large, wide-screen television adorning the wall.
Harry smiled and downed his drink.
“Your father speaks highly of you.”
William frowned and went back for a refill after having finished his own. Harry’s attention was focused on the screen, so William took the advantage and inhaled a couple of lines from his stash on a table in the corner. Meant for the guest’s enjoyment, William always managed to hoard most of it for his own use.
“You want to come and watch with me?”
William nodded, joining the other man on the large, cushioned sofa.
“You’re young. Sixteen? Seventeen?”
“Almost eighteen. Two weeks.”
Harry nodded.
“You really are handsome. My guess is you’ve been told that before, though.”
You’ve become a fine looking man. William shrugged.
His eyes fell on Harry’s crotch and he noticed the prominent bulge pushing against the slacks. He reached across and began rubbing it with the palm of his hand. Better to get it over with.
“Mmm. That’s nice,” came the deep voice. “But it’d be nicer in your mouth.”
Like a robot, William pulled the cock free and took it into his mouth. Harry’s hands were in his hair, twisting and pulling and he realized this client enjoyed it rough. He complied and added a bit more force to the blowjob.
Harry’s breath hitched. “No, stop! I don’t want to come yet.”
William obeyed and let the cock go.
“Just let me catch my breath, okay?”
He sat back on the couch and waited for round two. A few minutes went by and William was getting antsy. Harry hadn’t moved, his eyes focused completely on the television.
“You like that?”
“What?” William asked, turning to the screen.
“Don’t tell me that doesn’t make you hard. All that fucking… all those men…”
He shrugged. “Guess I’ve gotten used to it. Same movie, different day.”
Harry laughed and his hand moved to rub against William’s jeans. “This would be better if you were naked.”
He nodded and did as he was told.
He stood in front of the other man’s dilated eyes and saw the look he’d become accustomed to. The look of hunger. Harry stood up, moving closer.
“You have a nice cock,” he whispered as he gave it a pull. “But you have an even nicer ass.” The man’s erection rubbed against William’s when their bodies met, large hands reaching around to grip his cheeks. “I’d like to have a go at that.”
William flinched and his body stiffened. Harry pulled him around in a quick movement, grinding his cock against the naked crack. “Bet you’re a real good fuck.”
He tried to pull away but the hands gripped him tighter. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“Stop, you bloody tosser. This isn’t funny.”
“Are you afraid?”
William pulled again. “Sod off.”
Harry laughed and pushed him hard against the wall.
“Go ahead and fight. Makes it better.”
William felt surrounded. The sounds of sex around him, the feel of the large body pushing against him and then finally the hands pulling, opening his ass for the large, dry cock to enter.
“No! Don’t!”
“That’s right, beg me to stop. Tell me you don’t want it.”
“Fuck you!”
Pushing and tearing against the walls of his rectum, he felt the burn as the man forced his way deeper inside William's body.
“God, that’s so fucking tight. Pretty boy like you... worth every fucking penny.”
He felt his ass give in, the blood becoming lubricant for the cock to glide on.
“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck…” Harry chanted, pushing in and out, in and out, panting and breathing, grunting against William’s neck.
William heard screaming. Tried to drown it out. Tried to stop it. It was the sound of his own voice but he couldn’t control it. He felt it when the man began to fill him, felt it when the object was pulled from his ass and felt it when he was let go and dropped roughly to the floor. Finally, the sounds in the room faded and everything went dark.
*******************************
Ethan wiped the come from his hands, put his cock back inside his pants and turned off the monitor to the guest room. He pushed a button to allow the CD Rom to slide open. He labeled the CD – William 5/21/2001. Placing it into a case, he pulled out the hidden drawer under his desk and placed the CD with the rest of his collection.
********************************
Xander led Spike back into the bedroom and eased him onto the bed, forcing him to lie down. “You’re okay. You’re safe,” he whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed beside him.
Spike looked up, his eyes distant, still wet with tears.
“It’ll never be okay.”
“Spike, listen to me. Let’s get out of here. There’s no reason for you to be here!”
“I can’t,” he said, his voice worn out and weak. “I have to stay.”
“Why would you put yourself through this? It’s not worth it!”
“It is to me. Xander, this is the only way I know to hurt him. Make him pay. I’m not gonna sit back and let him have my mum’s company! It might seem stupid to you, but it’s all I’ve got. I just have to stick it out a little bit longer.”
Xander nodded. “Then we’ll stick it out together.” He pulled the blanket up to cover Spike’s body and began to walk back to his own room.
“Xan?”
He stopped and turned back around.
“Please stay. I need you.”
Moving back to the bed, he climbed in under the blanket and pulled Spike against him, wrapping his arm tightly around his waist. When he felt Spike’s body relax against his, he finally let his own do the same.
Questions? Comments? (No threats of bodily harm, please! I'm just telling it!)
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2004-05-26 02:41 am (UTC)Now I'm just sayin' here. You better fix it, okay? Please?
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:24 am (UTC)tears
Re: tears
Date: 2004-05-28 03:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 03:24 am (UTC)Hope
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 04:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-28 03:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 05:13 am (UTC)But yeah, I'm all for Spike kicking his ass. Preferably soon.:)
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:30 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2004-05-26 09:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-28 03:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 09:51 am (UTC)::hugs::
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 12:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-28 03:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-28 03:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-26 01:04 pm (UTC)I'm just hoping those CD's will be Ethan's down fall because fall he must, preferably landing on something excruciatingly painful!
Wonderfully moving chapter, now I'm off to sniffle in private and give my darling Walter a hug.
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:39 am (UTC)I needed comfort after writing this one...
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Date: 2004-05-27 08:51 pm (UTC)And wonderfully rendered.
Looking forward to more.
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Date: 2004-05-28 03:41 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2004-07-18 06:55 am (UTC)